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9 Colleges with the Hottest Sports Fans
While most every state school has its share of talent due to enrollment alone, what we are looking for in this list is concentration of talent. I’m sure Amherst has some hot girls, but if you go to one of their football games, are you going to feel awash in a sea of hotties? Probably not. If you go to a Clemson home game, will you? Yeah, probably.
While Southern schools enjoy a well-deserved reputation for ruling the roost when it comes to girls, in an effort to keep this from turning into an SEC and ACC breakdown, I’ve decided to cast a slightly wider geographical net. So just because Utah made the list, there’s probably an SEC school out there with a stronger showing. Consider it affirmative action for schools not in the deep south.
If you have a problem with my picks, let me just say that I’m sure your alma mater had millions of crazy-hot girls and you, like, totally banged them all. So chill out.
It’s the whole “forbidden fruit” thing. We covet what we can’t have. But even these girls would get down with us, they would still be among the hottest fans in our fair nation. Mormons enjoy a disproportionately high percentage of hot girls. I don’t know the science behind it, but it is what it is. Maybe all those years of clean living and kindness wear themselves well on the BYU student body.
In addition to looks, the women of BYU also are among the most die hard college fans there are. BYU is a unique school and the students there take a tremendous amount of pride in it. And yeah, I think that girl’s hair is pretty weird too. But she’s still hot.
The rumors are true. Despite being located plum in the ghetto, USC draws both preppy debs and beach girls, in addition to boasting ethnic diversity that guarantees that there will be something for men of all tastes.
And while loyalty may not be known to the pro teams of LA, the girls of Troy are die hard and can be found at LA Memorial Coliseum or a sports bar cheering on the cardinal and gold any Saturday USC plays.
Now that we’re done celebrating the Confederacy, let’s go west. But not too far. About 500 miles east of the Pacific. Where sun-kissed blondes sprout like so many desert cacti. Again, we climate directly play into the aesthetics of the student body. Since the temperature can get up to 231 degrees Celsius in the summer, all the girls will be tan and all the girls will be dressed for heat. Both great things.
Probably the weakest fan base of all the universities on this list, but still relatively strong, provided they have football and basketball teams that are worth a damn. But, oh those tans….
Georgia has a leg up on other schools in that their school colors make every girl wearing them look like a Arena Football League cheerleader. Well, the colors and their kickin’ bodies, but it’s been proven scientifically that girls look 31% sexier in black jerseys than in a jersey of any other color. Well, it hasn’t been proven, but it hasn’t been disproven either.
Apologies to the SEC and ACC schools that didn’t make the cut. You know how good you have it. You shouldn’t need my validation.
Never has the word “Hog” looked so majestic as it has when it’s stretched across a hot Razorback co-ed’s t-shirt. The Razorbacks are among the only four interesting things in Arkansas, so the entire student body (in addition to some talented townies) throw their weight behind their university every chance they get.
(In case you were wondering, the other three things interesting in Arkansas are: 1)Hot Springs; 2)….shit. There are only two interesting things in Arkansas. Three if you count Bill Clinton.)
Tennessee’s breed of hottie sports fan is most likely to wear a cowboy hat unironically, drinks slightly more whiskey than your typical SEC co-ed, and has a slight inferiority complex since Peyton left. An insane trifecta.
3. Ole Miss
I did my best to celebrate geographically disparate schools, but you just can’t rate the SEC highly enough when it comes to their female sports fans. First off, the Southeast US cranks out collegiate hotties the same way they crank out cotton, citrus, and peanuts. They’re beautiful. And beauty gets you halfway to this list.
To get all the way, you have to also be a FAN. Not someone who attends games, but someone who can’t tell you the scores of the last three rivalry matchups. Girls that treat the special teams coach like Justin Timberlake when he shows up in the cafeteria. It doesn’t hurt that weather and culture in the Southeast US dictates that Daisy Dukes, tank tops, and cowboy hats are not only tolerated but encouraged.
While these schools are certainly unique in many ways, their similarities seem to exceed their differences. They’re all state schools, which means they draw a fairly large sample size, the aforementioned weather is pretty homogenous, and football culture is instilled in the students while they’re still in the womb.
Ole Miss historically has been one of the lower-profile SEC schools, but just cause you don’t see it doesn’t mean it’s not there. And these women are there. While the Southern tradition has bred tolerance when it comes to paying respect the “Colonel Reb”, it appears that even Southern traditions are progressing, as the student body recently voted to replace him with a more politically correct mascot. Although there are 18,000 schools, only 3,400 students voted.
Hot AND politically apathetic? Count me in.
Breeding grounds for hot sports fans are determined by a few geographic factors. Is your school located South of the Mason-Dixon line? If so, you probably have smokin’ hot girls flying the school colors on fall Saturdays.
If you’re not located South of the Mason-Dixon line, your best bet is to be rural. The whole farmer’s daughter thing is a legitimate turn-on, and the more remote the school, the more students get behind their sports due to a lack of options. Both the state and campus of Iowa are nothing if not rural, so if you find yourself in Iowa City, take a look around and appreciate the free-range, corn-fed girls and be glad you’re not dealing with cooped-up coeds at a place like NYU or Temple.
1. Florida State
The Florida panhandle breeds hot women. That’s why strippers are Florida’s #2 export behind cocaine. The combination of Seminole football loyalty, stripper genes, and the warm Florida climate guarantees that every home game will look more like a PG-13 rated spring break more than it will a collegiate event. Which is a good thing.