The Daily Gambling Fix 3/23/11 — Megan
9 Hottest Female Surfers
Here are some really hot surfer girls. The hottest, actually. Hmm. What else can be said about these girls? They’re almost all blonde, tan, in great shape and the median age is hovering around 20. If you’re still reading this and not scrolling down for the pictures yet, you’re weird. I’m going to berate you until you move your eyes down the page and look at the ladies.
“You are a small, petty person of weak constitution. People talk about you behind your back. A lot. And almost never good things. It seems as though you could get knocked over by a stiff breeze. Your significant other cheats on your almost all the….”
Good. You’ve moved on. Enjoy.
9. Anastasia Ashley
A girl named “Anastasia” that resides in both southern California and Oahu. Is there any chance at all that this girl isn’t going to be smoking hot? She was also voted PETA’s “sexiest vegetarian.” If you love animals, that might be a turn on. If you hate them, there are ate other entries on this list that might share your love of bacon-wrapped pork.
8. Christa Alves
Christa Alves is 20 years old and is a better surfer than almost everyone because she’s got 10 years under her belt. Christa has put together a slew of trophies during four years of competition, which doesn’t differentiate her too much from the rest of the pack, but what does is the fact that that she was raised in Florida. No Pacific Ocean for this beach bunny.
7. Karina Petroni
This one was born in the Panama Canal. I thought only boats were born in the Panama Canal! However, this Central American upbringing allowed her to thrive with outdoor activities. However in 2000, when her family moved to the US, she had a difficult time adjusting. Until she found surfing. Also, she has a hot Norwegian mom.
6. Alana Blanchard
According to TW Surf, Alana is “the hottest surfer in the world.” Well, this is Total Pro Sports, and I say she’s 6th. Whatever. These girls are pretty much all tied for number 1 in my heart. She’s a friend and competitor of Bethany Hamilton, who many of may know as the girl that got her arm eaten by a shark. She lives in Kauai, Hawaii, which is a good place to live because it’s an island, which has a lot of beach. I’m rambling. Let’s move on.
5. Sage Erickson
Another girl that splits time between Oahu and CA. That’s not bi-coastal, but it’s bi-something. Let’s just say that both Sage and Anastasia are bi-curious. Let’s just say that and silently keep to ourselves for a minute. She’s only 20 and has scored the bronze at the ISA Junior Championships in Portugal. What have you done with your life that’s so great? Nuthin’.
4. Stephanie Gilmore
She’s won the women’s tour every year she’s been on it, so it’s hard to argue with her being a surfer in the truest sense. One look at this pic demonstrates that she’s also “hot” in the truest sense. As such, if you’re ever in South Wales, Austalia, you should probably look her up. Aren’t you going to be there next week?
3. Bruna Schmitz
If I give you the name “Bruna Schmitz,” you might not automatically think “hot surfer.” You would probably be more inclined to think “German dairy farmer.” Well, what’s she actually hails from Matinhos, Brazil, so this girl is just defying expectations left and right. Most importantly, though, Bruna, you taught us to love again. Thank you for that.
2. Laura Enever
Another Australian, Enever hails from Narrabeen, which, for those of you who aren’t familiar with Australian geography, is…in Australia. Presumably near the water. In January 2010, Enever won the ASP World Junior Championships in her hometown. Which seems a little unfair to everyone else, but whatever. They can deal. She’s hot.
1. Monycka Byrne Wickey
Lastly, we’re gonna toss your way a Hawaiian-American. Except there’s no such thing as that, so we’ll just call her an American. With a bunch of “y”s in her name where there should be “i”s. But we’ll give her a pass because the last name “Wickey” is fun to both say and type. She’s from Hana, Maui, and she has a boyfriend that’s a pro surfer, which probably means that he’s cooler and better looking than you. Sorry to end on a down note. Ok, fine. We heard once that Monycka had a dream about you. Don’t put too much stock in it. She made us promise not to tell, but you should know.