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11 Sexiest Women’s Summer Sports Uniforms
Remember how you made that New Year’s resolution that you were going to start living some kind of active, healthy lifestyle? Remember how you kept putting it off and putting it off, until you finally promised yourself that, once the weather was nice, you’d get outside and get fit? That promise probably involved joining a softball team, or maybe the tennis league at the YMCA. And you were probably also thinking in the back of your mind that, heck, it might even be a good way to meet cute girls wearing cute uniforms, right?
Well, now it’s mid-July, and you can cook an egg on the sidewalk. It’s just not safe to be out there exercising in this kind of heat, you are telling yourself. But you’re in luck. You don’t have to forgo all the perks of summer sports. This isn’t the ‘80s; there are alternatives. You can look at pretty women in sexy summer sports uniforms from the comfort of your own air conditioned home. So fix an ice-cold glass of lemonade, sit yourself down in a comfy chair, and check out this list of the sexiest female summer sports uniforms.
Rowing is perfect exercise. You use just about every muscle in your body while also getting a nice steady cardio workout. Plus, the better a woman gets at rowing, the better she looks in that tight outfit. Unfortunately, the same is not always true for men. What is one of the sexiest summer sports uniforms for women is one of the least sexy summer sports uniforms for men. (Google it. You’ll see.)
Remember when softball players used to wear big baggy shirts and shorts that looked like pajamas (top)? Well, times have changed. Now, not only do softball uniforms actually look “athletic”; they are actually downright flattering. Don’t get me wrong, Jennie Finch could have made a burlap sack look pretty sexy. But wouldn’t you have preferred to see her play in the baseball-style unis they’re wearing in college these days?
Netball is a sport derived from early versions of basketball. It’s typically played by women, and is popular in Commonwealth Nations (i.e. nations that were formerly part of the British Empire in the 18th and 19th centuries, such as Australia). As you can see, rather than baggy shorts that come down to their knees, netballers wear sporty little dresses that come down to about mid-thigh. Not bad, right?
8. Field Hockey
The traditional field hockey uniforms with the plaid skirts looked pretty good. The modern ones look even better. They still wear skirts (so the sport is still “ladylike”), only now they’re a bit tighter and made of light, breathable fabric instead of wool. In the end, the players feel more comfortable and the outfits are more form-fitting. Everybody wins!
7. Track and Field
Like all summer sports uniforms (or, for that matter, like any clothing whatsoever), the sexiness of track and field uniforms depends on who is wearing them. I mean no offense to long distance runners, but the uniforms they wear are not very flattering for the body types their sport produces. Now, athletes competing in the combined events like the heptathlon or pentathlon? Well, I think that’s who those insanely tight uniforms really flatter.
Sadly, swimming uniforms are getting less sexy every year. Twenty or thirty years ago, in the absence of ridiculously skimpy uniformed sports like beach volleyball, swimming probably would have been #2 right behind tennis. Today, more and more female swimmers are going with those weird full-body superhero suits intended to flatten curves. I understand they gotta do what they gotta do to stay competitive. It’s just unfortunate for losers like me who like to ramble on about the hotness of female sports uniforms.
Golf attire hasn’t changed too drastically over the years. Fabrics have been improved—they’re now lightweight and breathable—but the basic style of clothing has remained the same. However, one thing has changed: the people wearing these clothes (men and women alike) are fitter and more athletic than ever. At some point people finally realized that the stronger and more stable your core, the stronger and more stable your swing. And that’s good news, because women’s golf uniforms were always kind of sexy. By the way, pictured is Natalie Gulbis. If you didn’t follow the LPGA, I bet you will now.
Is cheerleading a sport? Sure it is. Is it a summer sport? Last time I checked, preseason football starts in August, so yes.
Women’s tennis has always featured sexy summer sport uniforms, and they have only gotten sexier over the years. However, unless the WTA can find an excuse for the women to wear bikinis—sand tennis, perhaps?—they have probably maxed out their sexiness. Thus, tennis uniforms will never be able to catch up with the summer sports that have supplanted them on this list.
2. Beach Volleyball
I understand wearing tiny bikinis to play beach volleyball if you’re just playing it recreationally, at the beach. But here’s the million dollar question: why do professionals still wear tiny bikinis? I know it’s optimal to have freedom of movement and all that, like track and field athletes, but male beach volleyball players wear baggy swimming trunks and they seem to be doing okay. Plus, the bikinis they wear seem smaller than necessary. Don’t get me wrong, I’m glad female beach volleyball players wear what they do. It’s the only reason to even watch beach volleyball. Okay, never mind, I think I just answered my own question.
Why are women’s surfing uniforms hotter than women’s beach volleyball uniforms? It’s simple, really: female surfers are hotter than female beach volleyball players. Of course, I don’t mean they are more attractive in any empirical way. What I mean is that professional surfing just has a special allure, a kind of je ne sais quoi.
Just ask yourself this: would you rather go to your 10-year high school reunion and say your girlfriend is a professional beach volleyball player, or a professional surfer? See what I mean? If you take a beach volleyball player, put her in a professional surfing outfit and stick her on a surfboard, she won’t be any more attractive, but she will be hotter. Ergo, concordantly, women’s surfing uniforms are sexier than women’s volleyball uniforms.