Some Los Angeles Dodgers Players Annihilated Children In Dodgeball (Video)
Human Head Rips From Abraham Lincoln’s Chest in Gruesome, Macabre Mascot Race (GIF)
Even Abraham Lincoln‘s REAL death wasn’t this gruesome.
(Probably. That assassination didn’t sound too fun, either.)
In a mascot race at Monday’s Washington Nationals game, the other two mascots—who I would be happy to call out by name, if a) I was caught up on my U.S. history, and b) they weren’t gross caricatures that resemble pretty much every founding father that signed the Declaration of Independence—unleashed a brutal clothesline on Honest Abe, forcing the man inside him to exit head-first through the abolitionist’s chest.
Strange times, my friends.
Here’s the GIF that you’ll never be able to un-see: