Yesterday, as you may have read somewhere, Gatorade unveiled a new series of commercials starring Peyton Manning as a gas station manager who refuses to sell gatorade to anyone unless they’ve broken a sweat and, therefore, earned it—because “Gatorade is for guys and gals who sweat.”
Of course, this is just Peyton’s latest effort in one of the most prolific endorsement careers in sports history. But it was pretty damn good, so that got us wondering: where does it rank on Peyton’s commercial acting curriculum vitae?
To answer that question, we put together this list of Peyton’s greatest hits. Take a look, and by all means, let us know if we missed any…unless you think those Papa John’s commercials were good. If that’s the case, just keep it to yourself.
Peyton makes this otherwise lame commercial for a boring car entertaining. (Get it? Peyton Manning is known for his unique audibles.) That takes talent.
21. Automotive Audibles (Buick)
When you're talking to a football crowd, you can't go wrong with a good soccer joke.
20. Soccer? Hahaha (Sony)
Technically the San Diego Chicken gets the biggest laugh in this one. But Peyton is in it, and it's funny, so it counts.
19. Control the Chicken (Sony)
Hilarious? Meh, not really. But it's funny.
P.S., for all you kids out there, at one point Reggie Bush was a famous and successful football player who dated Kim Kardashian.
18. Rivalries (NBC)
This is just the first of many Peyton-Eli collaborations we'll see on this list. Apparently people just can't get enough of the brother jokes.
17. Brotherly Hijinks (SportsCenter)
Peyton Manning's acting skills really are impressive. There aren't many players in the NFL today who could pull this commercial off.
16. Priceless Fans: Cut that Meat (MasterCard)
Obviously this commercial was made long before the famous "f**king julius!" incident during the playoffs last year.
15. Supporting His Team (MasterCard)
Get it? Peyton Manning only things about football.
14. Priceless Christmas (MasterCard)
I've never anyone say a single bad thing about Peyton Manning. Everything I've ever read says he's kind to everyone and extremely generous with his time. So that's the reputation this one is having fun with.
13. World Traveller (MasterCard)
Now you know the secret to Peyton's success. It's the mechanics.
Somebody should show this to Tebow.
12. Throwing Mechanics (Gatorade)
The funny thing is, Peyton doesn't really get sad when the season's over, because for Peyton the season is never over. The guy does not stop.
11. End of Season (Gatorade)
Golf advice from a football player? Sure, why not. It's probably better than football advice from a golfer.
10. Golf Advice (Gatorade)
Peyton and Eli's 2014 rap epic wasn't quite as good as their 2013 effort, but it does feature a pretty awesome cameo from Broadway Joe.(It's true, too. Namath would try to hook up with your mom.)
9. Fantasy Football Fantasy (DirecTV)
At #8 we have the new Gatorade campaign. Peyton doesn't get the opportunity to show off his range as a comedic actor, but the commercials are still very good.
8. Sweat Police (Gatorade)
In addition to being just flat out hilarious, this classic also shows how amazing Peyton Manning would look in a moustache. And Eli's fu manchu isn't bad, either.
7. Football Cops (DirecTV)
Most of the commercials Peyton and Eli did for Oreo were dreadful. (If you have watched the one with Donald Trump, don't.) But this one just kills me every time.
6. Double Stuf Racing League (Oreos)
Peyton Manning has the truth, and the truth will set you free!
5. Priceless Pep Talk (Master Card)
Peyton Manning. Deion Sanders. Fairies.
What more do you need to know? This one is a classic.
4. Football Fairies (DirecTV)
"Yeah what's the deal man...but I like this tapenade."
That might be the greatest line in the history of Peyton Manning commercials.
3. Football Fairies in the Fridge (DirecTV)
Remember when people had flip phones? It was like eight years ago, and yet they seem so ancient now.
2. Laser-Rocket Arm (Spring)
You probably figured this one would take the top spot, and you were right. "Football on Your Phone" is a masterpiece. I can't even tell you how many times this song popped into my head in the year or so since it first came out. It's clearly Peyton Manning's greatest achievement as an actor.