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Anyone Want This Baltimore Ravens Wedding Cake Statue Modeled After the Ray Rice Assault? (Pic)

by: Penn Collins On  Wednesday, September 10, 2014

Baltimore Ravens wedding

The fallout from the Ray Rice scandal is far-reaching, but who would have thought it would have gotten to Baltimore Ravens wedding cake paraphernalia? Not me. And probably not the people who make such things for the Baltimore Ravens, at least not after the Ray Rice situation.

The item in question, in case you’re lacking in the eyesight department, features, a groom forcibly dragging his bride…to somewhere. A game? The wedding? There’s football stuff around, but he’s not dragging her TO any Baltimore Ravens wedding stuff, so it’s unclear what’s going on. I guess the big takeaway is that it looks a little violent and probably shouldn’t be used to top any wedding cake. Of course, that’s also true for before the Ray Rice issue, as this little gem is tacky as shit and wildly unnecessary.

If you think about it outside a Baltimore Ravens wedding context, you could imagine the groom is Roger Goodell, and the bride is everyone that thinks he’s withholding the truth. Then it becomes a poignant metaphor.

Oh yeah, it’s $65 on Etsy. So if you want to create an awkward tension between you and a betrothed couple, buy this for them, and make it clear that you expect to see if on their cake on the big day.