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ESPN Unveils the Identity of Left Shark!!! (Video)
No one is hotter right now than than Left Shark from Katy Perry‘s Super Bowl halftime show. That is, assuming you are reading this in the second week of February, 2015.
Everyone wants to know who he is, and ESPN, mercifully, has unveiled the identity of Left Shark. I don’t want to ruin the surprise, so let’s just watch the video. Also, if you don’t want your kids to learn the truth about Left Shark, for God’s sake don’t show them this video. It will ruin their childhood, assuming you haven’t ruined it already:
Wow. Allow me to pick my shocked self up off the floor. WHAT AN INSANE TURN OF EVENTS! Left Shark is none other than ESPN’s Bran Weinstein. *GASP* Right Shark is John Anderson, but no one gives a sh*t about Right Shark. Right Shark can just go to hell.
Left Shark, however, has a very bright future in front of it, and I can’t wait to see where the fish’s rising star takes it. I’m hoping Broadway, but it will probably just be some reality show on SpikeTV or Lifetime. If that’s the case…Left Shark deserves better, and so do the countless fans of Left Shark who have been there since the beginning.