When was the last time you saw somebody jogging in a sweatsuit?

Today, sports uniforms are tight fitting and made of lightweight material. The primary benefit of this evolution, of course, is performance. But the secondary benefit? Unexpected boob sightings. In fact, these days you can hardly watch a (female) sporting event without seeing a nipple, butt crack, or tightly packaged derriere.

Total Pro Sports thinks this is fantastic, so we’ve put together a list of 50 classic sports wardrobe malfunctions. We think you’ll be amused.

Enjoy.

Perhaps his reference to blue balls had less to do with his messed up color wheel, and more to do with the feeling he gets after watching Maria Sharapova in action as she unleashes her barrage of sexually-suggestive grunts.

Hat tip – [The Big Lead]

If Serena Williams was going for the “giant bottle of Pepto-Bismol” look, I’d say she nailed it with this incredibly bright pink spandex suit.  Talk about a fashion statement!  This flashy outfit makes its statement loud and clear – hot pink is never a good idea.

We spend a lot of time at TPS talking about the hottest women in sports, but of course there is a totally different facet to female athletes that merits discussion – many of them could beat the crap out of you. Granted men have a genetic advantage when it comes to strength, but that advantage will only take us so far when we are up against the likes of these women. So say what you will to them, but I recommend you be respectful an courteous, otherwise you could end up as a stain on the floor.

15.Chyna

Just because she engaged in fake wrestling doesn’t mean she’s not a real bad-ass. I mean, just look at her. She’s huge. Is there anything else you need to know? Her arms are roughly the size of my thighs, and, in her heyday, she regularly lifted people up and threw them to the ground. Doesn’t sound like my idea of a good time, but if it does for you, I’ve got her number.

14 Gina Carano.

She’s the best-known female fighter for a reason. She made her debut to mainstream culture during the nationally televised CBS MMA exhibition and has shown herself to be a force ever since then. She may only be #3 in the world, but she’s #1 in our nightmares.

13. Aneta Florczyk

12. Alison Stokke

She’s actually kind of small, but don’t let the tight, small frame fool you. This woman earns her living throwing her body over a bar using a pole. Which means she could just as easily hand plant on your coffee table and kick you in the head. I’m not saying she would – she seems like a sweet girl – but she could.

11. Kira Gracie

Any female that’s got the Gracie DNA is going to be on this list with very few questions asked. Kira hasn’t gotten into MMA, but in the realms of Brazilian Jiu-jitsu and grapping, she’s a world champion. So yeah I think she could take you in a fight. Hard. She’s also only 25 years old, which means she’s gonna get tougher, while you just get fatter.

10. Julie Kedzie

5’6”, 123 lbs doesn’t sound THAT intimidating. Until you realizes that Julie uses every inch and pound to beat her opponents to a bloody pulp in MMA fights. She’s currently only ranked tenth in the circuit, but if you get a sense of confidence from that, you’re probably digging your own grave.

9. Carissa Gump

An American weightlifter, despite being only 5’1” and 130 lbs, happens to own most of the collegiate powerlifting records in our fair land. Her husband Jason is a weightlifter as well. I’d love to watch a domestic dispute at their place.

8. Olha Korobka

A 25 year-old Ukranian woman that can clean and jerk over 325 lbs is pretty intimidating. And in case you’re confused as to whether or not that’s all lean muscle…it’s not. She’s 5’11” and 368 lbs. She might be the only one on this list literally capable of snapping you like a twig.

7. Toccara Montgomery

This female wrestler (not WWE, the real kind) isn’t one to be trifled with. She’s 160 lbs, she competed in the Olympics in 2004 and her dad is in jail for 30 years for two counts of murder. So, uh, step right up.

6. Brandi Chastain

Sure, it’s been a while since that moment when the US Women’s soccer team won the Women’s World Cup in 1999 and Brandi threw modesty to the wind and took her shirt off, it was pretty clear that she looked like she was carved from stone. You could grate parmesan on those abs. She may only be 5’7”, but she’s still playing pro soccer at age 42, and she’s still tougher than you are.

5. Laila Ali

This one gets in on genetics alone. Even if her last name wasn’t Ali, she’s 5’10”, 160 lbs, and has scores of boxing titles to her name. 24-0 as a pro boxer. I’m not going to oversell her. She was the best female boxer in the world, and she could still kick your ass.

4. Holly Holm

She’s 26-1 as a professional boxer. What’s your record? Yeah, that’s what I thought. After sufficiently owning that league, she branched out into MMA. So go ahead and get a little rough with her. See what happens. I’ll even give you a tip. She’s a southpaw, so keep that right guard up.

3. Hayley Wickenheiser

Even Sports Illustrated has bequeathed her one of the 20 toughest athletes, regardless of gender. Since 1995, Hayley has been regarded as the best and toughest female hockey player in the game, having turned down many offers to play in men’s leagues throughout the world. Her reluctance to join wasn’t out of fear. Rather, she decided, at the age of 31 to go back to college and get her degree.

2. Venus Williams

The lesser of the two Williams sisters is still not all that “less.” If there were any fights between these two as kids, I’m guessing that they involved broken bones and shattered furniture, not just pulled hair and scratches.

1. Serena Williams

No surprise here. This half of the Williams sisters is clearly the larger, more dominant sister. There may be other women on this list that are stronger than her, but none of them would have as much fun lifting you above her head and twirling you around her head. Trust me, I’ve dealt with her before. Granted it was in a valet line, and she was very polite and nice, but still….I could tell she had a thirst for blood.

With the Twitter world continuing to give us bloggers something to talk about, today we turn to Ron Artest, a.k.a. Real_Ron_Artest.  Sunday evening, Artest posted the following Twits regarding his thoughts on the Williams sisters:

A rather hilarious analysis from the new Laker.  I wonder what Jason Whitlock would think of this.

Artest has since provided more comedy through his Twitter:

Sounds like Ron is a little strapped for cash these days.  Maybe that can help explain his shitty ride.

Venus and Serena, The 18 Sisters

Venus and Serena, The 18 Sisters

Hat Tip – [Rumors and Rants]

Now he is seemingly challenging Serena Williams to turn her “oozing pumpkin” butt into a “stuffed onion” in his latest column, which we discovered thanks to Deadspin.  Maybe he should consider rolling his fat ass off the couch and doing the same.

In his article titles “Serena Could Be The Best Ever, But…”, Whitlock speaks about how we should view Serena Williams as an underachiever, how she has wasted her God-given talent because of laziness and a love for food, and how she is much like Paris Hilton.

Paris Hilton?  Are you f*cking kidding me?

Whitlock states that “with a reduction in glut, a little less butt and a smidgen more guts, Serena Williams would easily be as big as Michael Jackson, dwarf Tiger Woods and take a run at Rosa Parks.”  He then goes on to say, “and all the people making excuses for Serena and rationalizing her failure to totally dominate women’s tennis are the very people uninterested in seeing women rise to a level of equality with men.”

Oh, where should I start.  Well lets begin with the fact that Serena should be given the opportunity to decide what she does with her body and her life.  She has won many tennis tournaments, built up her celebrity status, and taken on other business endeavors, all the while maintaining her place among tennis’ best.  She seems to be enjoying it and if not she can always just leave the game to do as she pleases.  After all, she has done it before.

So how does such a comment lead someone like Whitlock to believe that I would be “uninterested in seeing women rise to a level of equality with men?”  Perhaps Whitlock should reassess his notion equality between sexes.  Equality means having the right to decide for yourselves what it is you wish to do without feeling the social constraints that are often attributed as a result of gender roles.  What jobs you wish to perform, and receiving equal recognition when similar achievements are accomplished regardless of whether one is male or female is also part of creating such equality.

In this case, Serena should have the right to decide what it is she wishes to do with herself.  If she does not wish to break every tennis record in the books, then so be it.  That is her decision.  If she does not wish to be in tip-top shape and become the sex symbol that Whitlock wishes she was, then too bad for him.  Maybe her sister, Venus Williams, is more to his liking.

It is comments like the following, made by Whitlock, which continue to place women in a state of inferiority”

“She’d rather eat, half-ass her way through non-major tournaments and complain she’s not getting the respect her 11-major-championships résumé demands.  She complains about being ranked No. 2 in the world when she’s not bitching on Twitter or her blog about new rules that forbid Wimbledon players from eating in the locker room.  Seriously, how else can Serena fill out her size 16 shorts without grazing at her stall between matches?”

Serena wins matches, but for him, she is still just an over-sized women who should watch her eating.  Since when did it become about the looks and not about the game?  Oh, wait!  It is about the winning for Whitlock.  Well I guess someone should remind him that the fat, overweight, out-of-shape Serena Williams just finished winning Wimbledon, defeating her much slimmer sister in the finals even after enduring a long, demanding match against top-seeded Dinara Safina.

Near the end, Whitlock then speaks about Serena’s limitless opportunities to “break the glass ceiling for female athletes and become the transcendent superstar who connects globally.”  It is as if he wishes to say a woman of he current size can not do the same.  Well here is an idea Whitlock.  Why don’t you get your fat ass off the couch and say this to Serena’s face!

The woman just won Wimbledon, her 11th major title.  It is stupid commentaries like Whitlock’s that prevent her from receiving the accolades she truly deserves.

We here at TPS congratulate you Serena and think you look and play great no matter what size your shorts are.

Oh, Jason, You’ve Really Gone And Done It Now… [Deadspin]
Serena Could be the Best Ever, but… [FoxSports.com]

Apparently, Franco will be the face of a new Nike advertising campagin and clothing line. Much like Anna Kournikova, she is not the best in the world at her sport, but who cares?  Franco benefits from world class looks and should be making a large amount of cash or this. 

According to the newspaper ABC Color, Paraguay, Franco signed a contract with Nike to be the face of campaign advertising signature sportswear. “In February 2009, Nike launched the campaign in Europe as Leryn image, so that the Paraguayan is shown on all the brand stores and in magazines,” says the tabloid.

Good job Nike, great scouting.