Hockey players don’t make as much money as baseball, basketball, or football players. Plus, most of them have major dental problems, and they are nowhere near as famous as other athletes south of the 49th parallel. However, on the whole, hockey players are a more down to earth, less pretentious bunch than the guys in the other leagues. Moreover, if I were going to rank the four major North American pro sports leagues accordance to the fitness of the average athlete—and I am, right now—I’d say the NHL is first, followed by the NBA at number two and the NFL and MLB in a tie for number three.
My point? Despite their relative anonymity in American pop culture, NHL players have a lot going for them and do pretty well with the ladies.
So today, in part to celebrate the return of the NHL after the Olympic break—but mostly just ’cause—we present to you the hottest NHL WAGs of 2014. As always, it’s totally objective and scientific, so don’t even bother disagreeing with it. Just take a look, accept the rankings as accurate, and enjoy living vicariously for a few minutes.
Status: wife of Henrik Zetterberg of the Detroit Red Wings
Apparently Emma Andersson is some sort of minor celebrity in Sweden, having become famous on the Swedish version of survivor or something. It doesn't really matter. All you need to know is that she's attractive and married to a superstar.
21. Emma Andersson
Status: married to Henrik Lunqvist of the New York Rangers
We move from one Swedish player named Henrik to another. Lunqvist's wife, Therese, isn't as "flashy" (i.e. well-endowed) as Zetterberg's wife, but she is classically beautiful, and together these two just might be the most stylish couple in sports.
20. Therese Andersson
Status: dating Tomas Hertle of the San Jose Sharks
Czech phenom Tomas Hertl may just be 20 years old, but he appears to be pretty serious with girlfriend Aneta Netolicka. She was in the stands sitting with his mom when he had his big breakout game earlier this season.
19. Aneta Netolicka
Status: engaged to Alex Ovechkin of the Washington Capitals
Maria Kirlenko might not be quite as stunning or successful as that other female Russian tennis player named Maria, but she's still quite the catch for The Great Eight.
18. Maria Kirilenko
Status: married to Carrey Price of the Montreal Canadiens
I thought the cowboy hat was maybe just a one-time thing. After all, Price is from British Columbia, not Alberta. However, a quick Google image search proved me wrong. The goalie who backstopped Canada to a gold medal at the 2014 Winter Olympics is quite the country boy, which I guess makes Angela a country girl.
17. Angela Price
Status: married to Ryan Miller of the Buffalo Sabres
Sabres goalie Ryan Miller is married to the exotic-looking Noureen DeWulf, whom you might recognize (but probably won't) from her role as Lacey on Charlie Sheen's Anger Management.
16. Noureen DeWulf
Status: married to Ilya Bryzgalov of the Edmonton Oilers
Ilya didn't win a gold medal in Sochi, but his hot wife in a sexy gold dress is a pretty good consolation prize.
15. Zjenia Bryzgalov
Status: dating Sam Gagne of the Edmonton Oilers
Sam Gagne is only 24, but usually if the internet gets wind of an NHL relationship it's at least somewhat serious. So who knows, maybe Rachel Linke will be Rachel Gange some time in the near future.
14. Rachel Linke
Status: married to Dave Bolland of the Toronto Maple Leafs
If you ever need advice for how to approach women who are way hotter than you, Dave Bolland is your guy. He's not an ugly man by any means, and he's a good hockey player. But Julia, here? Way out of his league.
13. Julia Bolland
Status: married to Nathan Horton of the Boston Bruins
Tammy here was in Playboy before marrying Nathan Horton and settling down. If you're interesting, I'm sure can find some of those pictures floating around the internet.
12. Tammy Horton
Status: dating Marian Gaborik of the Columbus Blue Jackets
Slovakia's Marian Gaborik must have been pretty bummed to miss the Olympics. However, nothing that allows you to spend more quality time with a woman like this can be that bad.
11. Ivana Surovcova
Status: dating Jonathan Toews of the Chicago Blackhawks
I had a tough time confirming whether the captain of the defending Stanley Cup champs is still, in fact, dating this former Lingerie Football League star. However, I couldn't find any evidence that they stopped dating, either. So here she is, cracking the top 10.
10. Lindsey Vecchione
Status: dating Brandon Prust of the Montreal Canadiens
Lucky dog Brandon Prust is dating French-Candien TV personality Maripier Morin, who's bears a pretty strong resemblance to Sophia Vergara.
9. Marie-Pierre Morin
Status: dating Scottie Upshall of the Florida Panthers
It probably sucks to play for the Panthers. However, dating sports reporter Melanie Collins probably makes up for it.
8. Melanie Collins
Status: dating Jarret Stoll of the Los Angeles Kings
For a guy who's decidedly not a superstar, the Kings' Jarret Stoll has an impressive list of girlfriends on his résumé, including Rachel Hunter, Katie Cassidy, possiblyPaulina Gretzky, and now Erin Andrews.
7. Erin Andrews
Status: married to Mike Fisher of the Nashville Predators
You would probably assume Carrie Underwood, reigning queen of Nashville, had met hubbie Mike Fisher because he plays for the Predators. However, that's not the case. They actually met and tied the knot while he was still playing for the Ottawa Senators.
6. Carrie Underwood
Status: married to Dion Phaneuf of the Toronto Maple Leafs
Canadian through and through, Elisha Cuthbert actually dated several NHL players (most infamous Sean Avery) before finding true love with the captain of the Toronto Maple Leafs.
5. Elisha Cuthbert
Status: dating Jiri Tlusty of the Carolina Hurricanes.
This Czech model used to date Jaromir Jagr. However, after she split from the 42-year-old NHL legend, Inna apparently decided to give younger guys a try. So now she's with Tlusty, whose just 25.
4. Inna Puhjkova
Status: married to Brandon Dubinsky of the Columbus Blue Jackets
Dubinsky hit the jackpot here. His wife Brenna, a former college basketball player-turned-model, is gorgeous and athletic.
3. Brenna McGuire
Status: engaged to T.J. Oshie of the St. Louis Blues
We learned a couple of important things about Blues forward T.J. Oshie during the Olympics. For one thing, he's really, really good at shootouts. For another, and more importantly, his soon-to-be baby mama/fiancée, Lauren Cosgrove, is insanely hot.
2. Lauren Cosgrove
Status: dating Sheldon Souray of the Anaheim Ducks
You might know this former WWE Diva by her ring name, Kelly Kelly, but these days she goes by her real name which, unbelievably, is Barbie Blank.
Sheldon Souray is one lucky guy.