Do the uniforms in women’s volleyball have to be so tight? I don’t think so. Male volleyball players wear baggy shorts and shirts and they seem to move around just fine. I mean seriously, have you ever watched a high-level men’s volleyball match live in person? That’s some high-flying, action-packed sh*t. I highly recommend it.
But I digress. My point here is that the uniforms in women’s volleyball—whether indoor or beach—don’t have to be so tight. But they are. And that is a fact that needs to be celebrated. So today we’re going to do just that…because, to be honest, I couldn’t think of anything better to write about, and because, in my experience, human males enjoy looking at this sort of thing.
Take a look. Become a volleyball fan.
Is there a volleyball equivalent of NFL Sunday Ticket that would enable me to watch the Brazilian women's volleyball team on a regular basis?
20. Team Brazil
Seriously, poker is on TV all the time. Wouldn't you rather watch this?
19. Jaqueline Carvalho
They're happy, I'm happy. Everybody's happy. (Except the other team, I guess.)
18. Happy Time!
Hey! Snap out of it! You've been watching this GIF for five minutes now, and your coworkers are starting to get suspicious of your vacant gaze.
17. Bikini Spike
Coach loves it when the girls get together and touch each other's butts. Right coach?
17. OK Guys, Butt Pat Huddle!
Have I mentioned that the shorts female volleyball players are really, ridiculously short and tight? Well, they are.
16. Getting Into Position
That's the great thing about beach volleyball. When things get crazy, you can just take a nice relaxing stroll on the beach with your teammate and work sh*t out.
15. A Walk on the Beach
Beach volleyball celebrations are the best, wouldn't you say?
14. Misty May Happy Dance
Okay, this one isn't quite as sexy as the others, but it's pretty awesome. More importantly, I'm writing the list, so I can do whatever I want. [Editors Note: Just to be clear, no, he can't.]
13. Super Slow MO
The hand signals they use in beach volleyball give horndog photographers and videographers around the world a perfectly good excuse to zoom in on butts. So that's convenient.
12. Communication Skills
Okay, so she's not playing volleyball. But there's volleyball in the background, and for all I know she's talking about volleyball. So it counts.
11. Volleyball Talk
Obviously, this was supposed to happen, so I guess it's not really accurate to call it a "malfunction." But you get the idea.
10. Wardrobe Malfunction
"Brr, it's pretty cold out here. Better put on a long-sleeve shirt."
"Pants too, then?"
"Nah, no pants. Don't want my ass to overheat or anything."
9. Nice Dig
Volleyball players are so supportive of one another. It's really nice to see. I'm totally moved.
German beach volleyball player Katrin Holtwick has some junk in the proverbial trunk.
7. Katrin Holtwick
Of course they have cheerleaders in beach volleyball! Four chicks in bikinis is not nearly enough.
6. Beach Volleyball Cheerleading
Really, the only wardrobe difference between beach volleyball player and beach volleyball cheerleaders is a slightly smaller bikini. Other than that it's pretty hard to spot the difference.
5. More Beach Volleyball Cheerleading
Yeah, pull those shorts up. They're not hugging your crotch enough.
4. Wardrobe Adjustment
Um, no comment.
3. Gotta Do What You Gotta Do
Like I said, the hand signals they use in beach volleyball result in a lot of close-ups of butts. I'll let you decide whether that's a good thing or a bad thing.
2. Hand Signals
Sometimes you just been to make a few adjustments, and you don't have time to be discreet about it.
Sure, you could wear pants or something that won't give you wedgies in the first place, but that's no fun.