Human Head Rips From Abraham Lincoln’s Chest in Gruesome, Macabre Mascot Race (GIF)
Even Abraham Lincoln‘s REAL death wasn’t this gruesome.
(Probably. That assassination didn’t sound too fun, either.)
In a mascot race at Monday’s Washington Nationals game, the other two mascots—who I would be happy to call out by name, if a) I was caught up on my U.S. history, and b) they weren’t gross caricatures that resemble pretty much every founding father that signed the Declaration of Independence—unleashed a brutal clothesline on Honest Abe, forcing the man inside him to exit head-first through the abolitionist’s chest.
Strange times, my friends.
Here’s the GIF that you’ll never be able to un-see: