The 2014 FIFA World Cup may not be over, but seeing as how 28 of the 32 teams have been sent packing, the majority of the fans who travelled to Brazil from all around the world have now gone home. And this fact, combined with the realtive lull in the action this week, makes today the perfect time to do a little best-of list featuring the most insane, die-hard soccer fans we’ve seen over the last three-and-a-half weeks.
This Neil Young doppelgänger with the fancy carrot hat? Yeah, he made the list. To find out exactly where he ranks, you’ll have to keep reading.
Cristiano Ronaldo aside, you've got to hand it to Portuguese dudes—they can grow some pretty sweet mustaches.
40. Portuguese Mustache Guy
If you've never shaved Old Glory into your head and beard, I think it's safe to say you are not a true patriot.
39. Stars and Stripes Forever
Hey look, Jim Carrey was at the Brazil-Colombia game!
38. The Mask Mask
First I saw the picture on the left and I thought, okay, I guess maybe one of his parents is English and the other is Italian. But then I saw the picture on the right and realized, no, this is just some dude who lives in Manaus and is really pumped that his city was hosting the World Cup.
37. Harvey Two-Face
Nothing to see here, folks. Just a German guy partying on the beach.
36. Inflatable Soccer Ball Balloon Suit
Apparently all sports fans from geographic locations famous for cheese are required by law to wear cheese-shaped hats to sporting events. (Cf. Wisconsin.)
35. Swiss Cheeseheads
The French national team has a rooster on their official team crest, ergo these classy rooster hats.
34. French Rooster Dudes
I'm pretty sure if an American dude showed up to a soccer game in a sombrero while riding a pretend donkey, that would be considered racist. But I guess it's okay if a Mexican guy does it.
33. Senor Donkey
No American fan became more famous at the 2014 FIFA World Cup than Mike D'Amico, a.k.a. Teddy Goalsevelt. The Chicago advertising director never planned on becoming famous, but when ESPN's cameras put him on TV he became the USMNT's unofficial mascot pretty much overnight, even appearing at an official U.S. Soccer pep rally before the Germany game.
The internet is a crazy, crazy place, isn't it?
32. Teddy Goalsevelt
The nickname for the English national team is The Three Lions, because their crest has three lions on it. So that explains this one.
31. The Three Lions
What do you get when you cross a pumpkin with an oompa loompa? A Dutch sumo wrestler.
30. Dutch Sumo Wrestler
"No, those masks aren't creepy atall," said nobody.
29. Creepy Brazil Fans
"Just in case people don't quite get it, let me just write the words 'die hard' on my chest."
28. Die-Hard Black Stars Fan
Behold a guy in a giant blue frog costume...because Japan.
27. Some Japanese Dude in a Frog Costume
Apparently this is some famous Brazilian comedy character, but to random American dudes on the internet (i.e. me) he's just another World Cup weirdo.
26. Suave Brazilian Dude
Sometimes one pair of glasses just doesn't cut it.
25. Intense Japanese Fan
So obesity isn't just an American thing.
24. The Rotund Colombian
I admire this guy's zeal, but I this is not an ideal outfit for watching soccer in 90º heat.
23. Captain Mexico
Dude, you're not supposed to even take Star Wars memorabilia out of the box. Hopefully this has sentimental value to you, because it's now worthless on eBay.
22. Darth Messi
If anyone knows where I can get this shirt, please let me know in the comments section. I want one very badly.
21. Captain Eagle Shirt
Here's a nice image to file away in your brain for those occasions where you need to think unsexy thoughts.
20. The Milk Maid
I believe this is supposed to be renowned Argentine hair trendsetter Claudio Caniggia...though knowing this makes the mask no less terrifying.
19. Caniggia Head
I don't have any clue what is going on here. All I know is that these guys are sporting some interesting headwear.
18. Ecuador Fans
World Cup soccer clowns are just as creepy as regular, run of the mill clowns.
17. Freaky Brazilian Clown Guy
Best I can tell, this Belgium fan has is supposed to be a soccer player riding a dragon...not that that would make any sense.
Apparently this gentleman really loves tigers.
15. Double Tiger Head Guy
This guy makes me very uncomfortable. Not sure if it's the nose or the nasty white goatee.
14. Japanese Flag Face
Not gonna lie—this one's pretty badass.
(Memo to Dan Snyder: yes, it's okay when people of native American decent don native garb in a way that actually honors the culture.)
13. The Aztec Warrior
What can I say? These guys are just hardcore.
12. Japanese Samurai Clowns
Something tells me this guy is probably not actually as fit as Mario Balotelli.
11. Balotelli Superfan
If there are such things as dominatrix clowns, I assume this is the kind of mask they wear.
10. Colombian Elephant Mask
Once again, if a couple of Americans went to a Mexican soccer game dressed as tacos, that would be considered racially insensitive. But when it's your own culture, you can do whatever the hell you like.
9. Los Taco Hermanos
In Brazil, "zebra" is a slang term for a team that records a highly improbable win—i.e., an upset. Thus, some people down there have called the 2014 FIFA World Cup the "Copa de Zebras," or the World Cup of Zebras, given all the shocking upsets.
Why do these Argentine fans seem to believe their team is a Zebra, even though many people picked them as a favorite at the start of the tournament because they have the best player in the world? No idea. But hey, it makes for some crazy costumes.
8. The Amorous Argentine Zebras
This is the kind of stuff that will haunt your dreams.
7. Brazil Eyes
This guy wouldn't be so creepy with out the orange lips. That's what just pushes the whole look over the edge.
6. Creepy Ivorian Dude
A super hero who had Godzilla for one of his hands? Why didn't I think of that?
5. Captain Chile
There were a lot of red, white, and blue teams at the 2014 FIFA World Cup, and I don't want to risk offending anyone by guessing which one this guy supported. Instead, I'll just give you the options and let you decide: Croatia, Chile, France, USA, or Russia.
4. World Cup Joker
I've just found my next Halloween costume.
3. The Mustachioed Luchador
Seriously, that's not Neil Young, right? Because he looks a lot like Neil Young.
2. Mr. Carrot Hat
I'm assuming everybody sitting next to this guy got a selfie before the game was over. After all, it's not every day you sit next to a guy wearing an inside out Chihuahua suit at a World Cup soccer game.