Stanley Cup Final Playoff Beard Power Rankings
June 11, 2015
The 2015 Stanley Cup Final has been better than anyone could have imagined. And I’m not just talking about the games, all of which have come down to the wire. I’m also talking about the Stanley Cup Final playoff beards, which have been nothing short of tremendous.
Of course, it wouldn’t be that way if NBC Sports chairman Mark Lazarus had his way. Earlier this week Lazarus admitted that he asked the NHL and NHLPA to get rid of playoff beards so they could market hockey players as sexy, clean-shaven boys next door. Which is, of course, a terrible idea.
Thankfully, the NHL and the NHLPA were like, um, no. So the playoff beard is alive and well. And to celebrate, today we bring you our 2015 Stanley Cup Final Playoff Beard Power Rankings.
Take a look.
Density: 3/10
Grooming/Style: 5/10
Intangibles: 6/10
TOTAL: 14/30
Tyler Johnson has been a scoring machine during the postseason, but he's got a few more years until he joins the ranks of elite playoff beard growers.
20. Tyler Johnson
Density: 4/10
Grooming/Style: 7/10
Intangibles: 7/10
TOTAL: 18/30
Patrick Kane's playoff beard still needs some work. But it's come a long way since 2010. In fact, I'm gonna go ahead and create an award for "Most Improved NHL Playoff Beard" right now and award it to him. Congratulations, Patrick.
19. Patrick Kane
Density: 6/10
Grooming/Style: 6/10
Intangibles: 6/10
TOTAL: 18/30
What Ryan Callahan's playoff beard lacks in bushiness it makes up for in scrappiness.
18. Ryan Callahan
Density: 5/10
Grooming/Style: 7/10
Intangibles: 7/10
TOTAL: 19/30
Boyle's beard is a bit scruffy, but the guy has one hell of a mustache.
17. Brian Boyle
Density: 7/10
Grooming/Style: 7/10
Intangibles: 6/10
TOTAL: 20/30
Hawks defenseman Niklas Hjalmarsson has a pretty thick beard, but it lacks that je ne sais quoi that some of the others on this list have.
16. Niklas Hjalmarsson
Density: 6/10
Grooming/Style: 8/10
Intangibles: 6/10
TOTAL: 20/30
Patrick Sharp has one of the more stylish beards in the 2015 Stanley Cup Final, which is hardly a surprise. He's one of the most stylish players in the league for years.
15. Patrick Sharp
Density: 5/10
Grooming/Style: 9/10
Intangibles: 7/10
TOTAL: 21/30
Alexander Killorn isn't sporting a traditional playoff beard look, but sometimes you have to take risks.
14. Alexander Killorn
Density: 7/10
Grooming/Style: 6/10
Intangibles: 8/10
TOTAL: 21/30
Duncan Keith's beard gets a little scruffy in the upper cheek area, but the chin and mustache are truly first rate.
13. Duncan Keith
Density: 7/10
Grooming/Style: 7/10
Intangibles: 9/10
TOTAL: 23/30
The intangibles? Yeah, ginger beards always score high in the intangibles.
12. Brayden Coburn
Density: 8/10
Grooming/Style: 7/10
Intangibles: 8/10
TOTAL: 23/30
Brent Seabrook scored the same as Brayden Coburn, but he gets the edge and the no. 11 spot in our power rankings because he looks scarier.
11. Brent Seabrook
Density: 8/10
Grooming/Style: 8/10
Intangibles: 8/10
TOTAL: 24/30
A thick, beautifully manicured red beard? Brad Richards is a playoff beard superstar.
10. Brad Richards
Density: 7/10
Grooming/Style: 8/10
Intangibles: 9/10
TOTAL: 24/30
Oh man, Ben Bishop's beard is just dirty. It's fantastic.
9. Ben Bishop
Density: 7/10
Grooming/Style: 9/10
Intangibles: 8/10
TOTAL: 24/30
If this whole NHL goalie thing doesn't work out, the Blackhawks' Scott Darling could always get a job as a barista at some hipster coffee joint.
8. Scott Darling
Density: 8/10
Grooming/Style: 8/10
Intangibles: 9/10
TOTAL: 25/30
I don't know if Stamkos will wind up hoisting the Cup this year. But with that beard, he definitely looks like a Stanley Cup-winning captain.
7. Steven Stamkos
Density: 8/10
Grooming/Style: 9/10
Intangibles: 8/10
TOTAL: 25/30
No, that's not Thor. It's 24-year-old Swede Victor Hedman.
6. Victor Hedman
Density: 8/10
Grooming/Style: 8/10
Intangibles: 9/10
TOTAL: 25/30
If Game 4 hero Brandon Saad's mustache was just a little thicker, he'd probably be closer to the top of the rankings.
5. Brandon Saad
Density: 9/10
Grooming/Style: 9/10
Intangibles: 8/10
TOTAL: 26/30
Oh man, look at that thing. It's majestic. Well done, Brenden Morrow.
4. Brenden Morrow
Density: 10/10
Grooming/Style: 7/10
Intangibles: 9/10
TOTAL: 26/10
Johnny Oduya—now there's a man who knows his way around a beard.
3. Johnny Oduya
Density: 10/10
Grooming/Style: 8/10
Intangibles: 9/10
TOTAL: 27/30
Hawks goalie Corey Crawford has an absolutely breathtaking playoff beard. It's a shame the thing is always covered up.
2. Corey Crawford
Density: 10/10
Grooming/Style: 9/10
Intangibles: 9/10
TOTAL: 28/30
The greatest beard in the 2015 Stanley Cup Final belongs to Jason Garrison. As you can clearly see, it's just glorious.